Friendly Rivalry
by everlovingdeer
Summary: "I'll be surprised if I can think of a single one that isn't." Rolling my eyes, I pondered carefully, "Although, I think all boys are probably immature to some extent– regardless of how old they are." He was silent for a little while before saying slowly, "Not all."
1. Friendly Rivalry

As I boarded the train for the start of yet another year away at Hogwarts, I wondered exactly what this year was going to entail. Last year had brought with it the horrendous toad who terrorised the entire school. But she was eventually dealt with and after the sudden departure of the Weasley twins, I found myself wishing for a quiet year at Hogwarts. Maybe I'd get that in my fifth year? Finding Ginny and Luna already in a carriage, I let myself in and smiled gratefully when Neville lifted my trunk into the overhead storage shelf.

Sitting down beside the older boy, I listened quietly to the conversation that the other girls had previously been talking about. Apparently, the twins had decided that their legacy needed to continue within the school's walls and their prank supplies were being ordered by the hundreds. Maybe it wasn't going to be a quiet year after all.

There was a prim cough from the doorway and we all looked to the doorway to see Hermione and Ron standing in the doorway.

"Do you need something?" Luna asked the pair as Ron tried to tug on Hermione's arm to get her to leave.

"Wait a minute Ronald," she hissed over her shoulder before she looked back into the carriage, "Shepherd, weren't you made prefect this year?"

"I was," I trailed off uncertainly.

"Well, are you coming or not?" She raised an eyebrow, "To the prefect's meeting?"

"That's now?"

I watched the older girl nod, and wanted to scowl. Why couldn't the meeting have been held once we arrived at the school? Technically, the school year hadn't even started yet and they were already shackling us with responsibilities that I still wasn't sure I was ready to handle. Looking back to Ginny and Luna, I sent them an apologetic smile as I rose to my feet, intending to follow Hermione and Ron.

"I guess I'll see you guys when we get back to the castle," I muttered with a frown, "Unless the meeting finishes earlier."

They were reluctant to let me leave and I was reluctant to leave too. Godric, I hadn't seen Luna and Neville since school had ended and I'd have to put off catching up with them until later on. Looking back to the older prefects, I walked up to them and motioned for them to lead the way.

Hermione went first, showing me the way as she spoke of the duties of a prefect. I loved the girl, truly, but sometimes she had a knack for being really annoying. What was the point in her telling me everything that the letter I'd received had said, all over again?

"What's the point of this meeting?" I asked the silent boy beside me.

Ron rolled his eyes, looking down at me, "I have no bloody idea."

"Then what's the point of having this meeting then?" It seemed like he had no answer to the question either and he shrugged.

"We just have to sit there for a while and listen to the head boy and girl talk about rules and regulations for a bit." Scrunching his nose in distaste, he continued, "We also get our patrol schedules too."

"You're likely to be paired with an older prefect," Hermione said from ahead of us, "That way they'll be able to show you the patrol routes."

"That makes sense, I guess," I acknowledged as we arrived at the carriage where I assumed, the meeting was to be held.

Upon opening the door to the carriage, I saw the number of people waiting inside and watched as the heads swung towards the open door. They'd clearly been waiting for us and we'd held them all up. Hermione grew a little flustered under the eyes but did nothing more than clear her throat and walk into the room. Ron followed after her and I watched the two sit beside each other. Looking over the carriage for an empty seat I made a face when I spotted the only empty seat. It seemed like the boy realised too and pulled an identical face before sighing in defeat.

Shutting the carriage door behind me, I headed towards the empty seat and dropped down into it, making sure not to touch him. Goldstein shifted a little in his seat and I turned my attention away from him and onto the head boy and head girl who stood at the front of the carriage.

Merlin, I thought with a shake of my head, Ron had been right. They _did_ start the meeting by going over the list of rules and regulations which I did my best to tune out. My attention only came back when a piece of paper was placed in front of me. Looking down at it, I realised that it was the patrolling schedule for the first term. Scanning over the timetable, I noted the timings of my patrols before freezing when I realised just who I had been paired with for all of my rounds.

Anthony bloody Goldstein.

I didn't like him and the older boy certainly didn't like me either. Our dislike for one another was not only mutual but very public and if you asked me when it started, then I wouldn't have been able to give you an answer. It would be impossible for me to pin the beginning of the dislike to one event but nonetheless, the dislike _had_ started.

Godric, I despaired, why did I have all the bad luck in the world. I briefly heard him scoff and thought that he might have noticed that we'd been assigned to be patrol partners.

As the prefects began to slowly leave the room, I rose to my feet, fully intending to get the head girl to change my patrol partner. The head girl, a seventh year Ravenclaw, was busy looking through the timetable to make sure that everyone had been assigned the right number of patrols. Standing a little distance from the older girl, I cleared my throat to get her attention. She looked up from the schedule, eyes settling on me as she gave me a cautious smile.

"Can I help you with something, Shepherd?"

"It's about my patrol partner," I began hesitantly, "I was wondering if I could change partners?"

"Why?" she asked curiously, raising an eyebrow, "Is there some problem with Goldstein?"

"We can't stand each other," I said seeing no point in mincing my words. "We're more likely to tear each other's hair out instead of looking for people out after curfew."

"I'm sure you'll manage to set aside your differences," she assured me, preparing to leave the carriage. I felt my shoulders slump in defeat as she patted my arm, "You're part of the same team now – you're bound to compromise eventually."

With those parting words, she left the carriage without looking back at me once. With a sigh, I went to leave the carriage too when my eyes settled onto the male figure, leaning against one of the seats as he waited for me.

"Godric, Goldstein," I muttered with a roll of my eyes, "what do you want?"

"Look Shepherd," he began as he straightened up, making his way towards me, "I'm not thrilled to be working with you either, but you don't see me trying to get out of fulfilling my duties."

"I'm not doing that either." Crossing my arms, I watched the infuriating man smile mockingly, "All I wanted was another partner to help me fulfil those duties."

"I didn't realise you were so unprofessional," he muttered with a shake of his head as he turned to leave the carriage.

Narrowing my eyes at his retreating back, I scoffed, "Unprofessional, my foot. I'll show you."

* * *

Maybe this whole doing rounds with Goldstein thing wouldn't be so bad? So far we had been back in school for a while and whenever we had rounds we rarely spoke. Sure, time seemed to drag on as we walked the empty corridors of the school but I'd already decided that it was the more preferable option over arguing with him in the dead of the night. I'd told him as much when I'd met him outside the Gryffindor common room for our first rounds. He hadn't believed me at first, but after realising that I had no intention of talking to him, he soon stopped trying to start a conversation. It was the only smart option really – whenever we conversed, we ended up fighting. Therefore, not speaking would mean that we didn't fight. And I didn't need to be a Ravenclaw to figure that out.

I looked up from my plate, pulled from my thoughts as Ginny settled down for breakfast, sitting across from me. She was dressed in her quidditch gear and I eyed her curiously – if there was a game then there'd have been a _lot_ more excitement within the house.

"Try outs today," she explained, helping herself to some porridge.

"That explains the reason why so many of the Gryffindors look like they're sick to the stomach," I remarked, taking the chance to look around the table and seeing just how many people weren't able to stomach any breakfast. "Merlin, Ron looks like he'll be sick."

"He'll be fine," she dismissed.

"No, Ginny," I insisted, looking at her brother with concern. "He's not even looking at any of the food on the table – I doubt he's even eaten anything."

She looked concerned suddenly, looking over at her older brother. "He really _should_ eat something before try outs. He might end up fainting otherwise and Godric knows, he'll never live that down."

"Maybe you should talk to him," I suggested, pouring myself a cup of tea.

"Why don't _you_?" she threw back, "We both know that the moment I go over there, I'll become a mini version of mum and he'll just get angry."

"Fine," I muttered, knowing she had a point.

Rising from my seat, I walked further down the table before sitting down in the space besides Ron. He startled a little, taken by surprise before relaxing when he realised it was just me.

"Sorry," he apologised, "I'm just a little tense."

"I can tell." Gesturing to his empty plate, I said quietly, "Why don't you eat something Ron? You're bound to do better once you've got some nutrients in you."

"I just don't think I can stomach it," he insisted and I rolled my eyes.

"Well, I've been sent over here by your sister to make sure you eat something." Setting a hand on his arm, I squeezed it gently, "And well, just between us, I think she might end up owling your mother to tell her that you're skipping meals. We both know that you'll end up facing a howler."

He sighed, muttering about nosey women but helping himself to a slice of toast. Only when he had eaten half of it, did I turn my eyes away from him to sweep across the great hall. My eyes met Goldstein's blue eyes and I stared back at him, waiting for him to do something. He was the first to look away.

Ron cleared his throat from beside me, "Is Goldstein giving you trouble? Do you need me to talk to him?"

"It's nothing like that," I reassured him as I spied Hermione and Harry entering the great hall.

"Are you sure?" he asked seriously, "I won't sit by and let some Ravenclaw pick on one of my little sisters."

"Oh please," rolling my eyes, I rose to my feet as I prepared to head back to my original spot. "We both know that I could take Goldstein with my eyes closed. And now that the other two parts of the golden trio are here, and I've seen you eat something, I'm going to head back to Ginny. Good luck with your try outs, Ron."

"Thanks," he chuckled a little self-deprecatingly, "I'm going to need it."

"We both know you'll get in because of your skills alone," I insisted before returning to the spot I had abandoned minutes ago.

As I sat down across from Ginny again, I took a sip of my tea, "Your brother's had something to eat."

She didn't appear to care as she announced, "Goldstein kept looking over at you when you were talking to Ron."

"He's probably mentally cursing me," I said without a second's thought, continuing with my breakfast as some of the house prepared to leave for the try outs.

Ginny, noticing this, was on her feet and hurrying out of the great hall without so much as a word of goodbye. I watched her leave the great hall with an amused smile and silently decided to stop by the try outs later today.

I should have known not to let my guard down, especially with the likes of Cormac McLaggen still in the hall. But I hadn't been paying attention and I found myself staring at the older man and feeling a little nausea rise within me. Who had the patience to be dealing with this man's ego so early in the morning? Certainly not me.

"Are you going to come to the try outs?" he asked without any preamble, leaning a little closer to me.

I leaned away casually, inching away from him, "I was planning to."

"Then I can trust you to show me your support?" he asked, smirking in a way he thought was handsome as he laid a hand on my shoulder.

Looking down at his hand, I eyed it dirtily, looking back to him and waiting for him to remove it. But of course, he didn't notice my reaction to his presence and instead kept talking about something or another. Godric, I _really_ didn't have the patience for this.

Just as I went to deliver a blow that would be fatal to his ego, the hand on my shoulder was swatted away and promptly replaced. I looked at the hand in surprise, before following the arm up to see the face of the person that had decided to step in. My eyebrows rose in surprise as I met Goldstein's eyes. He wasn't looking at me though, he was busy staring in McLaggen's.

"Granger's at the quidditch pitch," he declared, "if you're looking for her."

McLaggen looked between the two of us before he rose slowly to his feet, "Thanks for the information, Goldstein."

I didn't watch McLaggen as he left the room. Instead, I turned my eyes to Goldstein who had yet to remove his hand. His hand returned to his side as I shifted my shoulder away from him.

He cleared his throat, "Don't bother getting the wrong idea Shepherd, I just came to remind you that we've got rounds tonight."

"I know," I said back quickly, "you don't need to remind me."

"Ok, then." He hesitated before turning to return to his table.

"Goldstein." He paused midstep, looking back at me for a moment, "Thanks."

He nodded without a word and continued on his way.

* * *

With quidditch try outs taking up most of the day, I took some time to finish my essay and by the time I folded up the parchment and stored it away, it was already dark outside. One look at the clock told me that I would need to meet Goldstein for our rounds and I rose to my feet with a sigh. Prefects rounds really _were_ a pain in the ass. Maybe I could give up the position during the Christmas holiday?

Dismissing the thought, I hurried out of the common room and waved goodbye to Ginny on my way out. Clambering out of the common room, I came face to face with Goldstein who stood off to the side, waiting for me.

"Where are we patrolling today?" I asked, making my way to his side.

"The second floor," he responded, throwing a look at the Fat Lady who made a comment about how Eagles had no business snooping around the Lion's den. Looking back to me, he rolled his eyes, "Your portrait's so annoying – how do any of you put up with her?"

"You have to announce the password before she can begin to speak." My eyes fell contemplatively to the blue trim on his robe, "Then again, since you're not a Gryffindor, I guess you'll just have to put up with it."

Turning my eyes away from him, I cast an anxious glance around the dark corridor. Godric, I hated patrolling late in the night. Chances were that anything found at this time were students sneaking out past curfew – most likely hungry students– but again, this _was_ Hogwarts and there was never any way of knowing what was lurking in the corridors. Now, if it happened to be a particularly aggravating defence teacher, then I was tempted to reach for my wand.

There was a noisy thud from further down the corridor and I jumped, unable to help myself as my heart pounded in my chest. Without my consent, my hand had reached out to hold onto Goldstein's robe. He snickered beside me and I dropped my hand back to my side, glaring at the older boy. Straightening myself out, I raised my nose haughtily and stormed ahead of him – even as I felt the fear still coursing through my veins. So what if I was scared? I wasn't going to show him that and give him something to tease me about.

"I thought you were supposed to be a fearless Gryffindor?" he teased as he caught up to me.

He was so busy grinning annoyingly down at me that he didn't catch sight of two red and gold ties on younger students who ran further down the corridor. Just like that, I knew the origin of the thud and all fear had dissipated. My eyes glanced briefly to Goldstein who I was certain hadn't seen them. With a sigh, I turned to face Goldstein and mentally scolded the young Gryffindors. If they needed to sneak out then why did they do it when a Gryffindor prefect was patrolling and could take points from them?

"I thought it'd take more than something falling to scare you, Shepherd," he continued and I narrowed my eyes at him.

"You're forgetting that the last time I saw something moving in the night, I ended up petrified in the hospital wing," coolly turning away from him I continued on, keeping an eye out for the students. They were thankfully nowhere in sight.

Looking back to Goldstein I saw the apologetic turn to his features and rolled my eyes.

"Don't go and become serious on me, Goldstein." I waved my hand dismissively, "It certainly made my first year unforgettable."

"Ok then, nothing serious," he promised and I lamented internally, where had not talking to him gone? Where was the mutual agreement we'd made to not talk to each other? Maybe this was all my fault for talking to him first?

Eyeing him cautiously, I raised an eyebrow, "What?"

"There's this rumour going round your year," he started casually, as if he was simply making a passing comments, "apparently you were very publicly asked out by one of the _handsome_ boys in your year and that you turned him down?"

"Why are people making a big deal about it?" I complained, knowing exactly what he was talking about, "I bet Knight made a big fuss over it too. Godric knows he made a big enough scene when I said no."

"So, it's true then?" He raised an eyebrow and I nodded. "Why'd you say no then?"

"Fifth year boys are too immature," I answered honestly, "I don't have the patience to put up with them. Ginny thinks I'm mad."

"Probably," he agreed, "Do you really think the boys in your year are too immature."

"I'll be surprised if I can think of a single one that isn't." Rolling my eyes, I pondered carefully, "Although, I think all boys are probably immature to some extent– regardless of how old they are."

He was silent for a little while before saying slowly, "Not all."

"Not all what?" I questioned curiously, sending a small look his way before continuing to scan the corridor.

"Not all boys are immature." He couldn't quite meet my eyes and I frowned, almost asking him what was wrong before stopping myself. Clearing his throat, he brought his eyes to mine, "I'm not."

My eyebrows rose into my hairline; he couldn't mean –

"What about it?" I questioned back just as quietly.

"Maybe you need to look at boys older than you," he continued steadily, coming to a stop and I found myself doing the same. "Like – like me."

"That's a good joke, Goldstein," I bluffed, unable to look at him as I forced myself to laugh. "I almost thought you were meant it."

"I do."

Letting out a sharp breath, I fisted my robe in my hands. I'd been worried he's say that.

"You don't mean that," I insisted incredulously, "we can't stand each other."

"I don't think that's true," he insisted, "And I doubt you think that either."

"Godric I think you've gone crazy." Taking a few steps away from him, I cleared my throat, "I'll forget what you just said."

With that, I did the most non-Gryffindor thing and ran away all the way to the common room. The portrait slammed behind me after I entered the common room, making the few students still awake, look over at me. Ginny was one of them.

She must have seen how out of sorts I looked, as she rose to her feet and approached me, "Are you alright?"

"No," I said quietly, "I'm really not."

* * *

By the time of our next rounds, my mind was still whirling from the bombshell that Goldstein had dropped on me. I was left thinking on the implications of what he'd said and more than anything, I wanted to be able to keep my words that I'd forget what he'd told me. Merlin, I wished I could do that. But they were all I could think of.

Godric, I just wanted to be able to act like we normally did. And that was thinking that he disliked me as much as I disliked him. Maybe I could skip the prefects round? But then there was always the chance that he'd come after me only to goad me into doing the rounds with him again. He'd never had a problem into goading me into doing stuff before – regardless of how he 'felt' about me.

I was still hoping that he had been pulling my leg and this was all part of some elaborate way of teasing me. But, according to Ginny that was impossible. She was certain that he was telling the truth and when I had asked her how she knew that, she'd said she could tell from his eyes. Whatever that meant. She'd also advised that I treated him as I normally would so that he didn't think that his obscure confession had somehow gotten to me. Except, she didn't understand that acting like that was impossible. I wouldn't be able to do that.

Half of me wanted to grab the obviously confused man by the shoulders and demand when he had started to trick himself into thinking he had feelings for me. The other part of me wanted to hide and not see him again until he changed his mind. But I was a Gryffindor, and we didn't hide. No matter how tempting the prospect of turning around and heading back into the common room was.

"Shepherd," Goldstein called out from further down the hallway, making me push those corners in the recess of my mind.

I watched apprehensively as he walked towards the common room. His steps slowed slightly as he grew closer and I fisted my robes nervously. How was he going to behave?

"Are you coming or not?" he questioned, stopping a short distance from me.

"Yeah," I cleared my throat when the word came out too quietly, "Yeah, I am."

He looked over me then, taking in the stiff way I held myself as I closed some of the distance between us and let out a sigh. "Well, come along then."

We patrolled in silence – just like we had done the first few times. Only this time I felt like the silence was suffocating me, especially because neither of us made an attempt to talk about the elephant in the room. Throughout the patrol I'd caught him multiple times as he began to say something, only to decide against it moments later.

Godric, it was going to drive me insane.

Especially because I found myself growing hyperaware of the distance between us as we walked. My eyes would stray to his hand as it swayed by his side with each step. When it grew close to mine, I debated whether or not it would be obvious for me to pull my arm away from him. I settled instead, for taking a small step away from him and tried to play the action off as being nonchalant.

He saw right through it; sighing but making no comment on it.

I saw his hand move before I felt the arm on my hand. The action had been made to get my attention, I knew that but I found myself reacting as if I'd been struck. Pulling my arm from his hand, I cleared my throat and awkwardly tucked my hands into my robe.

He sighed once again and I'd already lost count of the number of times he'd done that tonight, "I didn't tell you for you to act like this." He twirled his wand between his fingers, fidgeting with it, "I never wanted to make you so uncomfortable."

So we _were_ going to talk about it after all?

"Why did you tell me anyway?" I couldn't help but ask quietly, raising my eyes to look at him properly for the first time since our rounds had begun.

Tucking his hands into his pockets, he glanced skyward for a moment. "I entertained some stupid notion that you'd reciprocate my feelings." Looking back to me with a self-deprecating grin, he acknowledged, "I guess I was wrong, huh?"

His words rendered me speechless; what was I supposed to say to that? But, it wasn't his words that were bothering me, it was the false grin on his face. It was so out of place on his face that I wanted nothing more than to wipe it off and replace it with his usual part warm, part teasing smile. If only I knew what words would make that happen.

He took my silence as my answer. "Don't worry about it Shepherd," he insisted, erasing the false grin and turning his attention back to the corridor before us. "I'm mature enough to know when to quit. You don't need to worry me pressuring you or chasing after you, or something dumb like that."

"Goldstein –"

"Act like it never happened," he said firmly and I eyed him uncertainly, "I mean it. If you act like it never happened, then I'll be able to do the same."

His words should have relieved me; after all, wasn't that what I'd wanted all along? So why did it seem like he'd asked for something impossible.

* * *

Arriving to the conclusion that it would be impossible to act like nothing happened, I decided to take a proactive approach to sorting the situation out. I had searched the head girl out and asked to switch partners and at first, she had seemed very against the idea but upon seeing how desperate I was, she had conceded. She was now to accompany Goldstein during his rounds and I was stuck with following the head boy who I'd never spoken to. Our rounds were stilted, neither of us saying a word and I had learned that the Hufflepuff head boy was rather serious and strict. If a Hufflepuff student was caught out after curfew, he didn't hesitate to take points and I stood to the side, watching him do his job.

I couldn't understand anything. This was what I wanted – I didn't want things to be awkward around Goldstein so I took myself out of that situation only to land myself in another where I actually missed him. Godric, this was all so screwed up.

It seemed like there was no right solution.

Groaning aloud, I threw myself down on my bed and buried my face into my pillow. Smothering another groan, I drew the curtains around the bed and stared up at the ceiling as I thought things over. I wasn't a bloody Ravenclaw – I didn't have the creativity or the intellect to think of a creative solution that would magically make things better. There was no way to reverse time and undo Goldstein's words and more than that, there was no way to undo the feeling of realisation that had bloomed within me. And what that realisation meant, well that was debatable. I hadn't pondered over it. Not yet; there were more important things to think about.

The curtains surrounding my bed were opened partially and I lifted my head from the pillow to see Ginny pop her head in. Seeing that I was awake, she motioned for me to move up and I did so without a word. She lied down beside me and we both stared up at the ceiling.

"What's got you retiring in here like a hermit?" she asked eventually, turning to look at me.

My eyes didn't move from the ceiling, "The Goldstein issue."

"Godric," she swore under her breath, "you're one stubborn woman. What about him now?"

"I'm just so confused, Gin," I admitted. "I mean, I switched partners because I thought that was the best thing to do. You and I both agreed to that –"

"No, _you_ agreed to that and wouldn't listen to me when I disagreed –"

"But now," I hesitated.

Ginny rolled over to lie on her stomach, propping herself up on her crossed arms. She looked down at me with a raised eyebrow, "But now?"

Meeting her eyes cautiously, I admitted, "I think I miss him. Which is so ridiculous because we spent most of the time arguing with each other."

"I still think that's foreplay to the two of you," she said bluntly, making me narrow my eyes at her. Sighing she gave me a look, "Did you ever think about _why_ you're missing him?"

"I don't know why," I insisted, "I was kind of hoping that you'd be able to tell me why."

"Why exactly did you think that I'd be able to understand your feelings when you can't?"

"Wishful thinking?"

She sat up suddenly, crossing her legs. Looking up at her with patient eyes, I waited for her to speak.

"You're not going to like what I have to say," she warned.

"I think I'll be able to handle it," I muttered, sitting up.

"Remember when he asked you to the yule ball? Or when he asked you to Hogsmeade last year? And you said no because you were so convinced that he was asking you as a joke –"

"It _was_ a joke –"

"And then he went with someone else? Remember the feeling that you adamantly claimed wasn't jealousy? Do you still think that wasn't jealousy?"

"And what if it was?" I asked, dreading her answer because I already knew what she was going to say.

Raising an eyebrow, she deadpanned, "Do I need to tell you that?"

"No," I muttered petulantly, the sinking feeling told me exactly what I needed to know.

Godric, how could I be so incredibly blind.

Groaning aloud, I flopped back down again and rolled over to bury my face in my pillow. I felt the mattress shift as Ginny moved and patted my back soothingly, even though doing so wasn't her intention.

She goaded me, even as she patted my back, "Are you really going to do nothing and let him slip through your fingers? You're a Gryffindor, act like one and you might like the outcome."

Looking up from my pillow, I risked a glance at her grinning face. She knew I'd fallen for it.

"What do you think I should do?"

* * *

Just this once, I decided to put all of my faith in Ginny. Just this once.

It had taken some grovelling with the head girl to change partners once again and she had simply rolled her eyes and muttered something about couple's fights before acquiescing to my request. Now here I was, waiting anxiously outside of the Gryffindor common room. I couldn't remember having ever been this nervous before, especially not when it came to a boy. Looking down the corridor, I saw his approaching figure and straightened up.

Fidgeting with my uniform and smoothing out an invisible crease, I schooled my features into a neutral expression. Hiding my nerves, I tucked my fidgeting hands into my pocket and watched him take the final few steps towards me.

"I thought we'd switched rounds partners," he said in introduction as we took off to begin our rounds.

"The rounds were a lot more boring," I said truthfully – at least partly. The other half of the truth could wait a little longer, just until I managed to calm my heart a little.

"Here I was thinking that I'd managed to scare you away," he muttered, nudging me with his shoulder. Not that he'd realise it, but the one action put me more at ease than a hundred words would have. "Even though we both agreed to act like nothing happened, you took the first chance to run away."

Right, I decided borrowing some of Ginny's Gryffindor courage when I realised I didn't have enough. It was time for me to take a risk and see where it went. And well, if this _was_ some sort of joke then I had the rest of the term to get back at him, and then the Christmas holiday to get over him. It would all be easy – especially because we were getting new partners next term. That was the plan.

"Shepherd?"

"Tell me truthfully, did you get annoyed that we kept switching partners?" I asked, raising a curious eyebrow.

"Not really," he said slowly, "I realised that you'd probably had your reasons for now wanting to be my patrol partner anymore. Just as I know you probably have a reason for wanting to be my patrol partner again. Right?"

"You're right," I agreed with a slight nod. It was best to be blunt about this. "I thought I needed some time away from you, Goldstein. But I tried it for a bit and found that I missed you."

Risking a look at his expression, I stopped in my step when I realised that after my announcement he'd been so shocked that he'd frozen mid-step. Not realising it, I had moved forward and now stood a few paced away from him. Turning back to face him, I cleared my throat and waited for him to say something as I met his wide eyes.

When it became apparent that he wasn't going to say a word, I asked cautiously, "Did you miss me?"

He snapped out of whatever stupor he had fallen into, closing the distance between us so he was at my side. "You know I missed you – I'm not going to say the words and give you an ego boost."

I frowned at him as he started to walk again. He'd slammed up some sort of defence, as though he was afraid of being hurt. Saying nothing else, I walked beside him as I thought about what to do now. Maybe being blunt wasn't the best approach, especially since he'd shut it down partway. Ginny had told me to tell him, straight-out, without hiding anything. Four simple words, she had emphasised 'I like you too' and this entire situation would be over. But if just the thought of saying those words was so embarrassing, what would it be like to actually say them? I sighed, Godric that's if I actually _could_ say them.

"Whatever it is that you want to say," Goldstein's voice interrupted my thoughts, "just say it. You've sighed ten times in the last minute or so."

"I don't think I can say the words," I admitted aloud, "it's too embarrassing."

Studying his features, I watched as he grew a little concerned. Even he knew that I wasn't one to voice my feelings – especially embarrassment, at that – so easily. Looking down at me, he stared at my face as if wondering if I was ill. My eyes lowered of their own accord, moving to the hand that was swaying at his side.

So maybe I wasn't like Ginny and couldn't be direct about it. But this, surely this was enough? This was me.

Letting out a small, unnoticeable breath, I reached out to take his hand in mine.

Looking up at him from beneath my eyelashes, I asked, "Is this ok?"

He nodded, looking a little winded and insecure at the same time. His hand tightened in mine, moving to interlink our fingers before he froze.

"If this is another one of your games," he began warningly, with just the hint of fear hidden in the words.

"It's not," I insisted with a shake of my head, "I promise."


	2. Epilogue

_2 YEARS LATER_

"Aren't you going down to Hogsmeade today?" Luna asked as she settled down in the seat across from me, and pulling her own essay out from her bag.

I narrowed my eyes at the sixth-year girls that were sat on another table as they started to mutter 'loony Lovegood' to each other and cleared my throat pointedly. They cast a glance over at me, seeing the eyebrow I arched their way before hurriedly turning away to get back to their work.

"Hogsmeade?" I asked, looking back to Luna, "I don't think so. I need to rearrange the patrolling schedule – the Ravenclaw sixth year prefects had a falling out and are making life difficult for me."

"Does that remind you of anyone?" Ginny asked with a pointed glance my way. Ignoring her words I picked up my quill, looking over the patrolling schedule.

"But if you don't go to Hogsmeade," Luna interrupted, voice concerned, "what's Goldstein going to do?"

"Anthony?" I questioned making her nod, "What does he have to do with anything?"

"He's waiting for you in Hogsmeade." She took in the surprise on my face and looked between Ginny and I with hesitation, "Didn't you know?"

"There _might_ have been something I forgot to tell you," Ginny admitted slowly, wincing slightly, "But in my defence, I've been really busy with the team."

"Honestly, Ginny." Rising to my feet, I looked briefly down at my wand and chewed my bottom lip contemplatively. "Did he say where he'd be waiting?"

"Honeydukes," Ginny called out after me as I began to make my way out of the library.

Waving thankfully at her, I paused in my step, contemplating. Backtracking slightly, I came to a stop beside the group of sixth years who eyed me apprehensively.

Clearing my throat, I declared loudly, "10 points from Gryffindor – each." They began to complain, quieting down at my glare, "And when you need to explain to the rest of the house about how you lost us 60 points be sure to mention the derogatory way you spoke about another pupil of the school. You should know better, especially after the battle last year. Prejudice views aren't tolerated in this school and if they continue, I'll see to it that you get punished further." They avoided my eyes, looking to their essays with the decency of appearing ashamed. "Do you understand? Good."

Continuing out of the library, I was in my dorm in record time. As I got ready, I reasoned with myself that I knew he wouldn't care how I was dressed and that there was no need to be so concerned about what to wear, especially if I was going to put a coat and scarf on top. But that didn't stop me from spending ten minutes deciding what to wear. And I would have spent longer had I not remembered that he had probably been waiting a long time.

I took the first carriage down to Hogsmeade and when it had come to a stop, I hurried to alight it before making my way to Honeydukes. Stopping outside of the shop, I took a moment to compose myself – I didn't want to seem like I'd rushed down here.

Stepping into the shop, I looked through each of the aisles and manoeuvred by way through the hordes of excited students. When there was no sign of him I felt my shoulders slump a little. Had he left already?

Someone took my hand, surprising me. My first instinct was to wrench my hand out of theirs but upon looking into familiar blue eyes, I stopped my struggles.

"Merlin you should have seen your face," he grinned, using our joined hands to pull me out of the way of a group of students.

"No one told you to go around surprising people," I protested, unable to stop myself from smiling.

"I thought you stood me up." Reaching up slightly, I fixed the blue and bronze scarf wrapped around his neck.

"I _am_ a busy woman," I insisted with a roll of my eyes.

"How could I forget?" He chuckled slightly, "I'm dating the head girl."

"And don't forget it." Nodding slightly, I slumped against him with a sigh. "If I knew how much work was involved in being head girl, then I probably wouldn't have taken the job."

He wrapped his arms around me, rubbing my back soothingly as he remarked affectionately, "You always _were_ lazy."

"It's what makes me charming," I objected as I straightened up to look into his face, "So, what made you come down to Hogsmeade then? Did you miss me too much?"

"Something like that," he agreed vaguely making me narrow my eyes at him.

"Goldstein –"

"Come on," he insisted, taking my hand and leading me out of the shop. I frowned, giving the chocolate a wistful glance before turning back to face him, "I don't know about you but I'm starving."

Eyeing him curiously, I kept it to myself as I found myself sitting across from him and ordering lunch. He was keeping something from me but I'd found out eventually. Before I could ask what it was, he reached into his pocket, pulling out a small giftbag from his inner pocket.

"Here," he said, sliding the giftbag towards me.

I took it curiously, eyeing him suspiciously as I did so. "What's this for?"

"It's an early birthday present," he explained, looking away from me.

"An early birthday present?" I repeated slowly, peering into the giftbag before raising my eyes to his, "I thought we agreed to meet up for my birthday?"

"About that," he winced slightly, "I've got some work thing scheduled on your birthday so I won't be able to make it."

"Work thing?" My eyebrows rose rapidly as I leaned towards him, lowering my voice, "Work thing! You're training to become a bloody auror! What work thing?"

"It's part of the training," he explained quietly, rubbing at the back of his neck, "We're going on a three-day mission."

"How can you say that so casually?" I exclaimed, "You know better than I do, the number of people that get injured on these missions."

"It's because I'm certain I won't get injured," he stated confidently, reaching out to put a hand on top of mine. "Don't you trust me?"

"Fine," I muttered under my breath, linking our fingers together, "But if you come back hurt from this mission, I'm breaking up with you."

He fought a smirk, "You care about me Shephard."

"Weren't you a Ravenclaw? How could you say something so stupid?"

He didn't say another word. Raising the hand he held to his lips, he pressed a kiss to the back of my hand as our food was brought to us.


End file.
